I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Randomize
