i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
where am i from again
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Omg I joined a choir last night...
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
