I think I died a long time ago.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
