You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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