i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Randomize