let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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