Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
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