I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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