What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
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You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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