someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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