Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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