dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I have fence marks all over my body
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I have post one night stand depression
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