My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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