I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
