Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Randomize
