Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Randomize