Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
