it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
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she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
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He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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