Kiss
Puke
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Randomize
