Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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