That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Randomize