Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
