but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Randomize
