i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize
