just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
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I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
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Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
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