so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
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