Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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