Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize