The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
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