If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
