Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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