Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
You need a sexual gate keeper
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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