He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize
