Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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