What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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