Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.