I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize