There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
