well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
