my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
