forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
sex in a hospital.. check
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
