a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
it was like eating out sand paper
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Randomize
