What did we do last night that was yellow?
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize