Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

Why don't you ever send me any naked pics

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(913): View more from Kansas

You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.

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(703): View more from Virginia

He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.

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(513): View more from Ohio

This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie

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(305): View more from Florida

I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn

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(949): View more from California

I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.

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(716): View more from New York

Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"

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(360): View more from Washington

Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.

(206): View more from Washington

Bangkok has him now.

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