bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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