Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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