She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Randomize