Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
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