And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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