it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize
