I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
